Team Baby’s First Christmas |

Team Baby’s First Christmas

‘Twas the day before Christmas, and all through the house. Not a creature was stirring. Except for a playful baby. And the tiny parasites rummaging around in his mommy’s gastro-intestinal tract.

Welcome to Christmas 2015.

This will be a year I’ll always remember as my baby Will’s first holiday with Santa, and the year I had the stomach flu on the eve to Christmas Eve and Christmas. It’s terrible timing on my body’s part. This is the week my house is usually as busy as Santa’s workshop. It would be some kind of Christmas miracle to say I was fully prepared for Dec. 25, and that all my presents are wrapped.

Where’s an elf when I need one?

At least the stockings are hung on the chimney with care. The Christmas tree is up and trimmed. So I have that going for me.

While I was feeling the brunt of the holiday stomach virus, I watched the one-hour, colorized “I Love Lucy Christmas Special” in bed. I kind of enjoy it in black-and-white, but it is fun to see Lucy’s red hair and blue eyes in full effect. She was funny and beautiful, and will always be an early influence for my humor.

Luckily I have an Ethel in my best friend, Megan.

The show started with Lucy and Ricky putting Little Ricky to bed early so he could wake up to a full spread of gifts, toys and a trimmed tree courtesy of Old St. Nick. They had Fred and Ethel come over to bring the tree and help decorate it with lights and ornaments. This must have been a ‘50s thing, to have a such a surprise from Santa for the kids on Christmas morning. I doubt I could pull it off this year, or any year for that matter.

My mom has told me stories about how her Uncle Jim and Aunt Mary would pull off such an admirable feat the night before Christmas. Their kids would go to sleep the night before Christmas and wake up the next morning to a fully decorated house, complete with a trimmed and decorated tree and toys underneath. The era was the ‘50s, so you know there was likely baby dolls and bicycles abound. I’ve always been amazed by that idea, that an entire Christmas set-up could be constructed in less than eight hours. I’m sure the kids were up as early as possible.

Uncle Jim and Aunt Mary probably never slept a wink.

I enjoy watching the Lucy special every Christmas because it includes the Vitameatavegamin episode, one of my favorites. Since it first aired in 1952, I’m doubting I need a spoiler alert here. But the set-up is Lucy does a commercial spot for the fictitious health tonic Vitameatavegamin made of “vitamins, meat, vegetables, and minerals.” And 23 percent alcohol. Think Geritol, an iron supplement once sold that had 12 percent alcohol.

For the young ones out there who have not seen it, I recommend a quick search of Vitameatavegamin — say that tipsy three times — and the YouTube link appears. I’m a huge fan of skit comedy, and this one is gold. And I really needed a laugh.

For five minutes, I think I actually forgot about the parasites.

Parasites or no parasites, I still must make baby’s first Christmas a memorable one. I think that’s going to take my team of helpers in Steve and our families to help make it happen. I’ll call them Team Baby’s First Christmas. Since Will is just five months old, I don’t have the added pressure of making sure Santa brings him all he’s asked for this year. He has been a good boy this year. He also can’t talk yet, so I’m Iucky there. He’s mostly getting clothes since he’s growing so fast I can barely keep up, and toys that rattle since he’s holding on to things, smiling and being an all-around cute, playful baby.

That smile has helped me through the worst of the virus.

I’m finally able to keep some liquids in me, and I see a chance for a long-winter’s nap in my near future. Hopefully I will be feeling my old self by Christmas morning.

Merry Christmas to all!

April E. Clark didn’t send Christmas cards out in time. Maybe next year. She can be reached at

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