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Following Scott Baio’s lead

Steppin' out with AprilApril E. ClarkGlenwood Springs, CO Colorado

I really have to give VH-1 credit.Celebreality – the series of reality shows starring celebrities ranging from Hulk Hogan to Danny Bonaduce – has me hooked, especially since Scott Baio and Bret Michaels are now in the mix.Yes, these days are all happy days.The network’s newest programming includes Michaels’ show “Rock of Love” and the former Charles in Charge star in “Scott Baio is 45 … And Single.”Scott Baio, can I borrow your life coach?I doubt if I could afford Doc Ali. There is a link on VH1.com where Internet users can ask her questions about commitment issues and life and work concerns.

“Dear Doc Ali, what’s the minimum number of cats a single woman can have to be considered a Crazy Cat Lady?”I wonder what she would think of my reality TV spoof idea, self-titled, “April Clark is 35 … And Single,” about my own relationship woes. I wouldn’t have the famous exes like Scott Baio does, or the kind of money he has to hang out on the golf course and the horse track with my buddies all the time. But the visits with my exes to find out where I’ve gone wrong could be entertaining. Especially the one who’s a professional paintball player.No lie.I can just see it now. We’d battle out our past problems on the paintball field and I’d end up crying with bruises and welts from the hits because I’m kind of a wuss. Or maybe I could get some good shots in myself … Talk about therapy.Like the saying goes, “Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” That’s especially true when it comes to dating.

It’s happening in Marble/Redstone to boot: The 11th annual Stone Carvers’ Exhibition, indoor/outdoor sculpture exhibit benefiting the Marble Institute of Colorado. Artists’ reception 6-8 p.m. today, Redstone Art Center sculpture garden, 173 Redstone Blvd., Redstone. Information: 963-3790 and (888) 963-3790, or visit http://www.redstoneart.comThis is why I’d kick it up here: This weekend, I’m headed to Marble for some rest and relaxation at a friend’s house who recently made the move to the Crystal River Valley. We’ll be camping, grilling out, hiking around and enjoying the scenery, as well as the Stone Carvers’ Exhibition in the Redstone Art Center sculpture garden. Just like a mini vacation in the mountains. Aren’t we lucky to live here?



It’s happening in Carbondale to boot: Euforquestra, afro-Caribbean-barnyard-funk, 7 p.m., with openers Louie and the Lizards, 5:30 p.m., free performance in the park, Sopris Park. Information: 963-1680 or http://www.carbondalearts.comThis is why I’d kick it up here: After some rough going while tubing on the Colorado River Sunday, I missed last week’s free performance in Sopris Park. My friend hurt her foot, requiring a trip to the emergency room. And I lost my tube and had to flag down a kayaker to retrieve it. Very humbling. I think I’ll stick to camping in Marble topped off with free music in the park in Carbondale and call it a weekend.


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