Man with the plan
I think my dad found his next calling. Dave the Wedding Planner at your service.When I was home for Christmas, my parents and I were visiting family friends, whose youngest daughter, Jenny, is getting married in December. The wedding should be the event of the year, complete with a Catholic ceremony and formal reception at a beautiful historic hotel in downtown Indy.This will most likely all go down for the price of an Audi A3, a college education, or a bone marrow transplant.You only get married once, right?Dave the Wedding Planner would laugh out loud at that one.Knowing my history of marital blisslessness and recalling the cash dished out for my day of infamy he thinks it’s crazy to spend that kind of money on one day. So, as we ladies dreamily perused bridal magazines and squawked over the menu, Dave the Wedding Planner offered his two cents.This is not the man a girl wants planning her big day.Unless her budget is about $250.”Hey, I have an idea on how you could save money on food,” he chimed in. “Have a bunch of pizzas delivered and make it an all-you-can-eat buffet.”I’m sure that would go over extremely well with the Omni’s chef.”Or you could have a make-your-own taco bar,” he said.I gotta admit, it would be a hit with all the kids.”And forget the fancy $1-per-slice cake,” he added.”Ask about 10 people to make Duncan Hines cakes, stack them on top of each other, add some icing, and voilà!”Now that’s classy. Yet moist. Very, very moist.”Or you could rent out a roller rink and have a skating party,” he said. “The first dance could be a couple’s skate.”There wouldn’t be a dry eye in the house.Of course Dave the Wedding Planner was all about suggesting a quickie drive-thru marriage in Vegas with Elvis officiating.That’s a wedding dreams are made of, Dad.The ladies were not buying my dad’s ideas, of course. By that point, they were on to discussing which sauces needed to be served on the side, rather than on top of, the meats or vegetables.Like a couple’s first dance or skate horseradish can be a real tear-jerker.Personally, I thought Dave the Wedding Planner had some wonderful ideas. So anyone looking for cost-cutting ideas, I recommend his services.Just don’t be opposed to tater tots and pigs in blankets as hors d’oeuvres.The kids will love ’em.April E. Clark will probably just elope if she ever marries again. Doesn’t everyone love a good surprise? She can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org or 945-8515, ext. 16601.
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Economics may seem complex, but it’s actually common sense, which explains why politicians have difficulty considering the economic effects of their legislation.