Valentine’s Day spells big trouble
“Well, aren’t we a nosy little Nellie?” husband-head mocked as I hung up the phone. “Do you mind telling me why you’re calling and asking people such personal questions?””It’s my job,” I shrugged. “I get paid to ask all kinds of questions.”Actually, I was working on a Valentine’s Day story which entailed asking a couple how long they’d been married, where they’d met and their most memorable Valentine’s Day. “In fact,” I said, slapping a piece of paper in front of husband-head. “I want us to answer the questions, too.”Husband-head rolled his eyes.”I can already see that this is going to get me in big trouble,” he said doubtfully as he read through the list.But Valentine’s Day is a good time to reflect on your relationship and to celebrate love and romance – hopefully with your significant other – so I thought it’d be interesting to see how we did.Husband-head and I each took a copy of the questions and filled out our answers to the Valentine’s Day quiz. The following are the results we ended up with:* How long have you been married?Me: “Almost 12 wonderful years … sigh …”Husband-head: “Longer than most convicts get for first-degree murder.”* What is your anniversary/date you were married?Me: “July 16, 1994.”Husband-head: “Uh-oh … I’m in big trouble …”* Do you have any children?Me: “NO!” (knocking on wood)Husband-head: “Not that I know of!”* Where were you married?Me: “In a lovely hillside chapel in a park. Although, it WAS a little warm in there …”Husband-head: “In a really, really hot little room that I couldn’t wait to get out of.”* Best wedding-day memory?Me: “Looking into my new husband’s eyes and imagining the life we were about to embark upon together … (sigh) …”Husband-head: “The two shots of Jaegermeister my buddies and I had before we hit the church.”* Best memories of your honeymoon and/or honeymoon night?Me: “We were leaving very early the next morning on our honeymoon and our limo driver had lost our luggage. When we finally arrived at our beachfront hotel in San Diego, husband-head wouldn’t go in the water because he thought something in the ocean would eat him.”Husband-head: “On our wedding night, the guy in the limo forgot to bring our bags to the hotel and my wife freaked out until 3 a.m. when they finally arrived. On our honeymoon in San Diego, she got mad at me on the beach because I wouldn’t go play with the jellyfish …”* Where did you meet?Me: “In a bar. I was bartending and he came in with 25 of his closest friends who were all buying him drinks because it was his birthday. He kept asking me out and I finally agreed because I didn’t think he’d remember, anyway.” Husband-head: “I don’t remember.”* How did you know he/she was the one?Me: “He seemed so well-mannered and intelligent.”Husband-head: “She laughed when I made disgusting noises with my hand in my armpit.”* Best Valentine’s Day gift ever?Me: I had been wanting to see the movie, “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” and husband-head decorated our bedroom with Greek stuff, made me a Greek dinner and had the movie ready in the VCR. I could tell it took a lot of planning and it was very sweet. Although I’m kind of glad he didn’t put on one of those white Greek skirts …”Husband-head: “The best gift I ever gave was a pair of red Chuck Taylor tennis shoes to a girl I was dating. I thought it was funny – she didn’t.”* Is Valentine’s Day still special?Me: “Of course it is. And I’m sure he’ll remember me with some beautiful flowers and a romantic card.”Husband-head: “Oh crap, is it Valentine’s Day? Uh-oh, I’m in big trouble …”Heidi Rice is a staff reporter for the Post Independent. Her column runs every Friday. Visit her Web site at http://www.heidirice.com.
Support Local Journalism
Support Local Journalism
Readers around Glenwood Springs and Garfield County make the Post Independent’s work possible. Your financial contribution supports our efforts to deliver quality, locally relevant journalism.
Now more than ever, your support is critical to help us keep our community informed about the evolving coronavirus pandemic and the impact it is having locally. Every contribution, however large or small, will make a difference.
Each donation will be used exclusively for the development and creation of increased news coverage.
Start a dialogue, stay on topic and be civil.
If you don't follow the rules, your comment may be deleted.
User Legend: Moderator Trusted User
Legislation may need to be adjusted to maintain its validity.