LETTER: Bed race honor incorrectly bestowed
After many eyewitness interviews and careful review of the video footage it has come to my attention that the substantial honor and glory of winning the “GREAT BED RACE OF 2013,” which occurred at New Castle’s Burning Mountain Days, has been bestowed upon the wrong team. With much disappointment I am compelled to write this quick note of clarification to correct this wrong. It appears that the youthful prowess of the Mr. T’s team has been greatly exaggerated.
On that fine day three worthy and well-trained opponents lined up to do battle on Main Street at what arguable was the sporting event of the year. Once the whistle blew all teams superbly started the race, though it was soon evident that Bob Byrams’ Team was doomed due to failure in the steering mechanism. Due to quick thinking and lightning reflexes, Bob was able to avert a great disaster in which I am sure many lives where saved. Then the real tragedy occurred when due to strategically placed misinformation regarding the finish line location, the Mr. T’s team eased up allowing the crafty and cunning Jim Shrull and the New Castle Garage Team to squeeze by and capture the win.
It is with great admiration that the Mr. T’s Team must hand over all falsely won honor and formally recognize the win goes to Jim Shrull and the New Castle Garage Team, which greatly deserves the enormous trophy and all the associated notoriety for both the win and for narrowly averting a heart attack in the process.
In proper humiliation,
Mr. T’s Bed Race Team
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